How To Keep a Quarrel From Turning Into War: 5 Ground Rules For Fighting Fair

Once you get married, you two will live a life of ultimate perfection, never arguing again, right?
Time for a reality check. You're going to have spats, tiffs, and occasional knock-down-drag-out brawls. It's part of living, loving, and making major and minor life decisions with another person. It's not the part of wedlock that you dream about, but it's a fact of married life. Since you know that, at some point, you two are going to disagree, set some ground rules. While most of your arguments should be fairly painless, when you're in the heat of the moment people may do crazy things. Don't be one of those couples who think throwing pots and pans or tantrums, and hurling insults means you're passionate. Instead, fight with a little class. Here are some basic guidelines that will ensure that you two can make up, not break up, at the end of the spat:

DON'T FIGHT IN PUBLIC

Okay, sometimes your timing stinks. You'll be out at a party wanting to hit the hay but your guy will be ordering another round of drinks, pretending not to notice. "You never thinks of me", you hiss just as your best friends come over to chat with you. Everyone freezes and you look like a shrew.

There's nothing more embarrasing than fighting in front of other people. It presents an unflattering portrait of your marriage and makes everyone feel uncomfortable. If you are constantly bickering or trying to bring other people into your arguments, everyone will start avoiding you two. If you're the type of woman who thought flinging her Chardonnay in your boyfriend's face at a party was an effective way to make a point, you now have to find less dramatic ways to communicate when your husband makes you mad. If you two don't see eye-to-eye when you're in public, have some codes you worked out ahead of time. A wink may mean "Let's discuss this at home". Touching your ear might mean "I'm miffed but I'm going to let it go because we're in public". Be prepared, though. Your guy may think it's funny to pretend he doesn't know what your codes mean. He may just laugh and ask if there's something in your eye.

DON'T BRING UP THE PAST

In the midst of a disagreement, it may seem like a good idea to bring up past examples of his bad behavior to bolster your case. It's not. Don't mention the speeding tickets he did from you, the bonus money he lost playing the slots, or the time he skipped your mother's birthday party. You've argued about these things before and he's probably apologized a million times. Instead of rehashing the past, when you present your side, stick to the issue at hand. When you bring up your guy's every blunder, things just go from bad to worse. He'll tune out of your point entirely and you'll find yourself having the same old argument instead of resolving your current dilemma.

DON'T TAKE OFF

We all get the urge to flee the scene when things get hairy. We want to lace up our Nikes, run out the door, and never look back. Frankly, sometimes it seems a lot easier to drive off into the sunset than deal with your standoff. This, however, only sends a message to your guy that you're going to bail when things go wrong. Checking into a hotel or staying at your mother's is unnecessarily dramatic and it brings other innocent people into your quarrel. The last thing you want is your mother or best friend worried , when all that's happened is you've blown a silly spat out of proportion. Resolve to leave the divalike behavior behind when you get hitched. If you absolutely have to have a change of scenery, take a walk around the block (but tell him where you're headed). Staying put will also force the two of you to come to some sort of resolution that you can live with.

DON'T SAY THINGS YOU'LL REGRET

At some point during an argument it is going to occur to you that you can say or do anything, because now that you're married he won't break up with you. This, of course, is flawed logic, because if you repeatedly throw hissy fits, or say nasty things, you create a tear in your marriage that becomes increasingly hard to sew up. After you make up, it's difficult to be loving wih someone who, the day before called you an idiot. Not every zinger your brain conjures up needs to be verbalized. If you have a hard time not blurting out insults in the heat of the moment, take a time-out before you state your case.

DON'T LIE

Some people think lying is a clever way to get out of things. But one little lie tends to lead another. Soon you'll be telling lies to cover other lies and you won't be able to keep up with yourself. So fess up. Did you go skydiving when you promised to be less of daredevil?. You've got to come clean. Telling the truth can be unpleasant, but it's got to be done. If you aren't both completely honest with each other, your relationship will suffer. You'll be constantly suspecting each other of lying or worse. If you can't trust each other, what's the point?. Your marriage should be a safe space, not a place you rummage through in search of proof of wrongdoing. If you want to do that kind of snooping, become a private investigator.

El Hombre Que Yo Amo

El hombre que yo amo es especial, para hablar de el no me tengo que inspirar, pues el solo hecho de pensar su nombre, evoca en mi grandes pensamientos y pone mis emociones a flor de piel.

Para hablar del hombre que yo amo, no hay que ir muy lejos, mas que simplemente revivir en mis pensamientos un momento con el y eso hara que brote de mi un manantial de palabras para referirme a el.

Para hablar del hombre que yo amo, no es necesario buscar palabras bonitas, si con tan solo saber que este sentimiento tan grande que siento vive en mi, las palabras mas romanticas y sublimes llegan a mi mente, tal como llegan el dia y la noche.

Para hablar del hombre que yo amo, no es preciso querer hacerlo, para hablar del hombre que yo amo, simplemente hay que amarlo como yo lo amo.